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January 16, 2018 - 10:03 AM
what
the
actual
fuck
and that can not be any clearer. there aren't even words ti begin to describe what we went through as a family and there never really will be. but i hope you see it in my eyes enough, i hope you can read it when i walk in the room.
i feel robotic repeating it, fast fowarding through words fast enough so that i can breathe again. its not real to me
and then it was out of no where, when that familiar face walked in the front door of my restaurant. the icu nurse that was designated to my sister. and that face she made in the hospital was the same face she gave when she realized who she was looking at. i wasnt the dead girl she thought i was, i look like my sister if you dont know me, and thats who she saw at first, and then the recognotion and sadness washed over her as she realized it was me, the living sister.
and it was her. the woman who took care of her when we couldnt because she was beyond our reach at that point. it crushed me and i choked so hard i almost asked to leave, i was gonna beg mercy from my boss. but i didnt.
i got my shit together.
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