i was sitting there, with my headphones on one ear and off another, listening to what they were saying. it iritated me since they knew i was there yet said nothing to acknowledge me. then they just up and left. didn't say one word. not one. i don't really mind though. emotions just seem to disappoint me. same goes for my friends.

maybe people have gotten to know me better through my emotionless expressions and speechless remarks. i'm just tired of upholding my happy image. just once, just one time i would like to be honest and for the past three weeks i've been somewhat sucsessful in doing so.

you will come down soon too, soon enough you will come down. and where do we go when we've already reached the bottom? there's no where to go but up but it always seems too far. like love. love is something too high for me. i'm not saying i won't ever reach that height, but for this time being, i'm too low to even seek the site of such warmth. i'm not sure i want to leave my darkness. not yet.

i don't really know.