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May 10, 2017 - 10:23 AM
worlds shatter like glass and i guess its the same when it comes to the heart. its that shattered mess that you can't possibly restore to its original shape. its that fine powder mixed jagged edges that slice your fingertips no matter how gently you pick them up.
but you still pick them up
memories of this and that, the warmth and smiles. sundresses and flip flops running wildly along trails to get to the same exact spot on the river you have claimed every day for the last month.
ending the days in some messy lovers conjunction, surrounded in a sea of bottles and pills with my head swimming in tune. this was my ideal shipwreck. free to do as i wished, whenever i wished it.
harmless enough on my own and detrimentally harmful when with others.
and now im this. a creature apart. understood on some level but not the whole of it. holding on to just a small glimmer of light these days. but the entire light exploded on day, my body shook so terribly and then i was just gone. remnants of all that i was aimlessly piloting this sack of flesh.
begging for this light to grow, waiting for my day. wishing that i could wake up in a different time, wondering all the time what it could have been like.
he dodged the bullet
but i took the hit.
<< nothing - now >>